Ang Katahimikang Wala Ako
I was lost in the middle of a poem
So richly riddled. The fault wasn't the poem's
It was mine. I went all the way to the end
Across the verse and called it just
How one moves on from within a poem.
Through the lines I broke into
I travelled without doubt.
My steps bore the unity and
As there are many things to love,
I tried for what was endless.
I thought I was for whom
Its large silence for so long waited.
But when I looked after the words,
I faced the silence in which I was not.
So richly riddled. The fault wasn't the poem's
It was mine. I went all the way to the end
Across the verse and called it just
How one moves on from within a poem.
Through the lines I broke into
I travelled without doubt.
My steps bore the unity and
As there are many things to love,
I tried for what was endless.
I thought I was for whom
Its large silence for so long waited.
But when I looked after the words,
I faced the silence in which I was not.
The first time I saw this poem, I skimmed through the entire thing until I came to the final two lines. For some reason, the ending caught me. The only thing that was flashing in my head was "OMG". Not "oh my god", but simply "OMG".
I don't know why it struck me so hard, but it did. Then I read the whole poem slowly, trying to comprehend fully. Funny, only then did I notice that the poem mentioned what I just did- "I went all the way to the end/Across the verse..."
I didn't get the poet's meaning if there was one; all I knew was that I loved the ending. But after reading the poem twice, I still couldn't get it, and I gave up. Oh, I was on the brink of gleaning something from it, alright; but I thought, why would I want to break this down in the first place?
Fully understanding the poem would mean that I had it simplified it in my mind. Sometimes, when something is so beautifully complex, perhaps it should be left that way. After all, if the poet wanted us to 'get' it, he would have written his message in plain prose.
With this kind of mentality, I'm glad I'm no longer taking Literature. I wasn't bad at it, but I just never found any triumph in writing a 4-page essay about the virtues of a certain poem. Literature essays are a joke. I don't see why we have to pick at every detail in the stanza and look for profound meanings in them when there are possibly none.
I'm not saying they're all meaningless, of course. It's amazing how a few well-chosen words have the ability to transform the most mundane things into a literary piece, but there is really no need for anyone to delve so deep into a poem and emerge with revelations about the poet's state of mind while penning it or whatever. Please. It's a poem. Lets just appreciate it (maybe marvel a bit, relate a bit) and move on with life.
The above poem was translated from Tagalog, by the way.
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27 comments:
The original poem, in case you read Tagalog:
ANG KATAHIMIKANG WALA AKO
Nawala ako sa gitna ng tulang kay
Yaman ng salimuot. Hindi ito sala ng tula
Kundi sa akin. Tinahak ko ang landas
Ng taludtod at itinuring na gayon lang
Ang magpatuloy palabas ng tula.
Sa gitna ng mga bersong pinasukan
Ay naglakbay ako nang walang alinlangan.
Nasa aking mga hakbang ang kaisahan
At dahil kay raming maaaring ibigin,
Sinubok ko ang walang-hanggan.
Inakalang ako ang matagal nang hinihintay
Ng kaniyang malaking katahimikan.
Ngunit nang lingapin ko ang mga salita
Ay humarap ako sa katahimikang wala ako.
-A. Arguelles
Nice. I can imagine you to be that lit student.. writing 4-pg essays and getting A's n stuff.. but not being very satisfied with what you write. or not being happy that you even wrote it.
Flash, trust me, that happened loads of times. The bad part for me was finding excess meanings which I'm sure the poet did not even intend.
Hello. Just passing by, I like that poem.
I'm filipino and Ayer arguelles is a published writer here my country. He gives talks sometimes. His poems written in tagalog are very meaningful, very compact. I wonder how you got to his website for the english translation?
Rgds,
D.C.B.
now nash. that's one of the many many things that i like about you. your opinions are not pedestrian. plus smooth reasoning as always.
Ps,it's just that to my knowledge, his blog is only known among the other filipino authors/poets.
nice blog btw. Bright!
again,
DCB
Having been a Lit. student for two years, and now, reading your post...you put words to my thoughts!
Brilliantly written and perfect reasoning. I'm stumped, heh, being a lawyer, I'd fight for my favourite subject but you're right. I have started disliking so many literary novels and poems just because I was forced to cut and dissect to the point of idiocy. But then there are some I fell more in love with, some.
"Sometimes, when something is so beautifully complex, perhaps it should be left that way." I like this line immensely.
hiyee! I've never heard this poem before nor the author. But anyways... I read both the english and tagalog version and i must say it is well written. There are some things meant to be read or kept as a whole, dissect it and it loses its meaning, its beauty.
@ DCB: Mr Arguelles kindly directed me to the translation. Bright? Haha, yes, it's a stark contrast to what I had before, if you had been here weeks ago. :)
@ frenchette: Nash kan sentiasa smoot. LULZ
@ PLP: Aww thank you. Thank you, on so many levels. Slap me a high 5, Lit student! I fell in love with some, too, but not that many for me to enjoy breaking more down, unfortunately.
@ Chinky: Yes, the beauty, that's what I think is the most important factor in all of this. The bigger picture is almost always more unique.
"After all, if the poet wanted us to 'get' it, he would have written his message in plain prose"
Oh baby ...
Did you ever just paraphrase me like all hell. This is one of my literary tirades LOL
<3 !
Nicely done, chica. I love me some tagalog poem anytime, i just didn't get the last line (in tagalog), but hey, like what you say... where's the triumph in that? Where did you find this poem?
@ Gad: When are you gonna learn that I can read minds! XD
@ Izan: The poet emailed me one day. Haha. No kidding. I told you about it, remember?
Oh yeaah. lol. Damn i'm a duh-head these days.
Sometimes part of the magic in the message comes from having to work your mind to figure out just what the message is, kind of like a math problem except not nearly as impossible and lame. And other times lines about sitting on cornflakes and yellow matter custard are just that.
@ Izan: These days? =p
@ Woo: Duly noted, Woozer. Thing is, most of the time we do get it; it's just that the process of breaking it down into simpler parts just for a good grade makes me feel like a fake.
hiyeee...I have an award for you. Please check out my blog. =) i awarded you with the cute blog award. mwah =)
Haha! Thanks Mel!
Nashe: If you were 10 ... no ...
20 ... years older LOL
I would want you to marry me :D
I am officially laughing my ass off, all alone in my room at 2AM.
Yeay, now I can brag that I have a soulmate from Texas. It just didn't work out. XD
Oh, wow.Do you speak Tagalog?
No I don't, Angel! I just know a few things like 'saklolo ako'(!!) and tulong... plus a few greetings. Haha!
wow! this is why i added your blog in my favorites. did you study our language (tagalog)? very impressive nashe.
Brilliant mind, you have. Lol! Unaccepted in the field of academics though!
@ Shyn: Thanks! Nope I didn't. My cousin tried learning it, and I picked up some words when she made me test her. =D
@Just: Bully for the field, don't you think!
hi nashe. thanks.
:-)
ayer
No problem, A.
:)
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