The Ruskiye
Weeks have passed without me publishing anything here. I've been saving my words as drafts because I simply had no idea how this post should appear.
There are so many events and things I've wanted to tell people about but just wasn't sure if I could say them out loud without sounding like a blubbering idiot. Coherence is not something I can come up with when there are so many points to what I want to say! Sometimes the things worth talking about are the hardest to find words for, you know?
But in any case, here it is. For the past 4 months, I've been seeing the Russian-speaking guy I sponsored. It has never even crossed my mind to call it 'dating' or whatever because it really doesn't feel like that, and that's what I like about it. Neither of us had to force it.
It feels like having a really fantastic male friend who woke up one day and decided that you were someone brilliant and special and starts treating you like you are. And me, I just went along with it because hey, which girl would turn down a guy who kisses your knuckles occasionally and calls you lovely all the time?
I didn't want to tell others about this because it just seemed so... unbelievable for me. I'd always thought we'd fizzle out as friends. Many people have paired us together since the start of last year and I've always brushed their opinions aside, because I just couldn't see it. Fast forward to 2013 and here we are? I mean, it's a little hard for me to admit outright that hey, we're actually together!; I don't want my friends to think I was just keeping them in the dark or something for the past year. But really, it just happened, and we were in the middle of it before we knew we had even begun.
And to be completely honest, I'm terrified. Terrified that, for once, I actually have something that's somehow workable with a really, really great person. It always seemed easier in the single ladies' camp! The fact that he's a foreigner with an immigration deadline in my country doesn't help matters.
But! I'm hoping that I don't let my fears push me into sabotaging myself. I'd be a fool to not take and enjoy this chance at happiness with an all-round amazing guy, right?
I mean, he makes brain jokes. My neurons are unable to resist. :)
There are so many events and things I've wanted to tell people about but just wasn't sure if I could say them out loud without sounding like a blubbering idiot. Coherence is not something I can come up with when there are so many points to what I want to say! Sometimes the things worth talking about are the hardest to find words for, you know?
But in any case, here it is. For the past 4 months, I've been seeing the Russian-speaking guy I sponsored. It has never even crossed my mind to call it 'dating' or whatever because it really doesn't feel like that, and that's what I like about it. Neither of us had to force it.
It feels like having a really fantastic male friend who woke up one day and decided that you were someone brilliant and special and starts treating you like you are. And me, I just went along with it because hey, which girl would turn down a guy who kisses your knuckles occasionally and calls you lovely all the time?
I didn't want to tell others about this because it just seemed so... unbelievable for me. I'd always thought we'd fizzle out as friends. Many people have paired us together since the start of last year and I've always brushed their opinions aside, because I just couldn't see it. Fast forward to 2013 and here we are? I mean, it's a little hard for me to admit outright that hey, we're actually together!; I don't want my friends to think I was just keeping them in the dark or something for the past year. But really, it just happened, and we were in the middle of it before we knew we had even begun.
 |
| Yeppers |
And to be completely honest, I'm terrified. Terrified that, for once, I actually have something that's somehow workable with a really, really great person. It always seemed easier in the single ladies' camp! The fact that he's a foreigner with an immigration deadline in my country doesn't help matters.
But! I'm hoping that I don't let my fears push me into sabotaging myself. I'd be a fool to not take and enjoy this chance at happiness with an all-round amazing guy, right?
I mean, he makes brain jokes. My neurons are unable to resist. :)
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The Nashty
- Nashe^
- Twenty7 and not much hotter. Looking for my happily ever after.
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Hawwllerrr!
7 comments:
ahem. ahem ahem. ahem ahem ahem. X) awww girl! *dances*
OH MY GOD. So happy for you!! GUess it's a blockbuster after all? If someone kisses my knuckles maybe I'll just die of all the feelings.
:-D
*dancing as well*
He didn't decide you are brilliant and special. He recogized it, as any intelligent young man should. :)
Wishing you two all the best.
Oh wow. I'm happy for you, dearest Nashty. This was a long time coming and you're right, no sense in wasting this shot at love and happiness. He seems like a really great guy :)
totally agree with you!!
xx
No, dear, you don’t want that.
You want Seventh-Heaven.
GBY
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